what are you looking at?

Don't you hate going into restaurant bathrooms with mirrors all over the place? Sure as shit, there's got to be some sort of angle that someone can see my pecker. And I'm not real happy about that.

the nasonex bee

Is this bee high?

It's the Nasonex bee. He's usually flying around flowers and just acting what I would assume would be bee-like, although he has some odd hispanic undertones. In the commercials, he says things like, "I have returned, a changed bee."

He's always smiling and get's great enjoyment when the giant nasonex bottle sprays allergy inhalents all about. Maybe I'm wrong. It's just an observation.

But what a weird ass motherfucking logo, huh?

Damn my Tri-holed keys!

Why does every key on earth look like this now?

I literally have about 15 keys on my keychain that look exactly like this. In fact, I would bet that you do as well. Like me, you probably only remember what each of them is for in sheer relation to what order thay're in on the rings... and this, my friends, can no longer stand.
I want to know why this design is so great. I mean, is it that you have 3 holes in which to choose to add painfully to your keyrings? That said, you're likely going to go for the middle hole because it has greater depth and allows the key to be seperated from the ring a little farther. Well, if all keys produced on earth will now look like this, I'm going to rebel and start putting the rings through one of the holes to the left or right.
When somebody goes to give me a key to something, I'm already betting in my head (before I even see the key) that it's going to look like that. I'm already agonizing on how the fuck I'm going to remember that particular key for whatever function it might be for. The simple fact that it might say "Wal-Mart" or "kwikset" is not enough for me to keep it seperate. I need more.
And why that design? Really... In your decision to have a key made, what made you decide to go for that one? You might like unifomity on your keyring, but I do not. I want variety. I don't like putting 17 keys in a lock before I finally pick the right one. I also don't like the little rubber things to add to the top of the key in order to differentiate. No, you should have thought about that when you had this key made. Isn't there another design, like a skeleton key, or a key with fur on it, or something like that?

Man. Fuck that key design. I've about had enough. I already find enough things to waste time on and unlocking the door should not be one of them.
I won't be happy until I get a key that looks like this:


My new Bozo key. Hopefully carried at Wal-Mart by 2007. One can only hope.