My Army of Monkeys and Horses.

i'm bored and yesterday i finished the majority of work i had to do for this week. so i figured what the hell. post a blog. yesterday we had band practice - which is really just an excuse for me to drink beer. after that, i went to Champs (or is it Champps... or Chammps...) and ate with a few people. it was kind of funny, because right before practice, i told talley and paul i was eating at Champs and they both laughed because they thought it was the shoe store. wouldn't that be interesting? so i went to the restaurant all the while thinking how funny it would be to eat in the shoe store, and drank even more. luckilly it's only about 2 miles from my house. when i finally got home, i opened another beer in the fridge and spent about 45 minutes trying to convnce the wild housecat that lives outside my house to come INSIDE the house because it was warmer in there. i finally warmed up some deli sliced turkey in the microwave and set it inside the front door. when the cat started eating the turkey, i shut the door and said "see? doesn't it feel much warmer in the house"? she probably thought so for a minute but then realized she was inside and started making all kind of fucked up meows and noises. i opened the door and with the quickness... she was up and out. i was sad because i thought i was being like St. Francis of Assissi, and i walked outside and told the cat this. then i started thinking how great it would be to have dominion and command over all animals, complete mind control. i would have an army of wild horses with chimpanzees on their back. the horse for the speed. the monkey for dexterity. i would send these armies over to old people's houses. as the herd of monkeys and horses approached the house, one of the chimps (the lead monkey) would get off the horse and quietly open the front door. he would then walk back to his horse, get on it and then lead the charge... 10, 20, 30 horses being ridden by monkeys running wild through the house. knocking over lamps... attacking the old people in thier beds... fucking awesome. alls well that ends well. i passed out on the couch with all my clothes on and woke up at 2 in the morning and my hand was asleep. michelle wie was on television on a replay of ESPN's Sportcenter. so i got up and went to bed.