Why does "bad news have to come in threes"? What's up with that. Why can't one bad thing happen and then it be done with. Isn't it pretty bleak to consider that once a single bad event has occured, you're still in for 2 more unfortunate things coming to you?
Why is there an "easter bunny" and not an "easter gazzelle", "easter ocelot", or "easter meerkat"? Why does it have to be a rabbit? After all, I've recently in the news about how a deer got into somebody's house and eventually knocked out a pit bull. More recently, a mountain lion was discovered in some guy's house. Perhaps these people were a little quick to judge. These animals were probably trying to deliver a little candy and/or treats to children while being discovered in their magical acts. After that, they had to defend themselves. I bet the Easter Deer kicked the shit out that pit bull. Could you imagine how the Easter Bunny would have faired?
How come everytime you end up on the phone with some business or corporation, their "menu has changed"? When the fuck was the original menu up... because every time I have ever called one, it has apparantly deviated from the last menu in some way. Is this some type of corporate decision? I can just see a CEO pacing in front of some huge table with other executives sitting around saying, "... oh, and by the way... Could somebody please get that damned menu changed?! We've had the same one for at least 2 weeks now!"
Also, I'd like to know when this change occured. Why can't you tell me that? Why can't you tell me that the "menu has not changed in the last 8 months" so I can have a point of reference. When should I start paying attention to the new menu? Will the menu be changing in the future? If so, when will it be changing? I need to mark my calendar.
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